There's no deficit of relationship advice for men on how to make your woman feel safe. There is far less advice for women on how to make their men feel safe. In order to open up, be vulnerable, and have the sort of intimacy that is the hallmark of a strong, long lasting relationship men need to feel safe.
Trying something new is always scary. You're worried about sucking at it, worried about looking foolish, and worried about what others might think. You're not going to hit a home run at your first at bat. That's ok. Trying something new isn't always easy and too often we get frustrated when the new is hard and doesn't come easy.
It's a brave new world, one that's going to require an intense conversation about what masculinity is and is not in the age of #MeToo.
So, where do we start? What stays, what goes, and what can we learn and embrace from the women in our lives to make us better men tomorrow than we were yesterday?
Forgiveness is hard and sometimes it can become a trap. Forgiving others can lead to a downward spiral of "why don't/can't they forgive me?" and sometimes the act of forgiveness of others and ourselves can seem an impossible task.
Taking a cue from "This Is Us" I want to give you a little encouragement. All we want as parents is for our families and kids to be okay. We can have our hopes and dreams for them, but when it comes down to it, we just want them to be okay.
So I want to challenge you to put aside your hurt for a moment and ask yourself if they turned out okay. If so, then you can take comfort in knowing you had something to do with that. Take comfort in the fact that they're okay.
Communication is the first casualty in any broken relationship. In today's social media driven world, it's even more difficult a challenge.
In order to heal, you may need to build walls to prevent angry communications and quiet the noise so you can focus on you and what your life is going to be going forward.
Once the noise settles, you can then open up doors to let those kinds of people who you want to be in community with into your life.
Living as a parent with estranged adult children is difficult. It can be painful to the point of being debilitating and there are days where it seems like the sun won't ever shine again. Let me be the first to tell you that it gets better.
The gaps between the sad times will get longer. Life will become enjoyable again. You will survive by putting yourself together again in a brand new way.
It's inevitable that at some point you'll receive angry or even abusive messages from your EC. It can be through Social Media like Facebook, angry voicemails, or even through text messaging.
In this video I teach you the three ways to handle your response to these messages, two of which are total non-starters.
In today's social media saturated world, more and more kids are growing up to be narcissists. They see the faux reality of others in their social media feeds and when they don't see their lives are matching up, they blame their parents for depriving them. When they see others doing things their parents don't allow, they call their parents controlling and abusive.
Unfortunately with social media it's easy for them to find others to enable this narcissistic behavior, further making it difficult to be a parent today.
The silent treatment is one of the most brutal weapons used in relationship wars. The silencer is telling you that you are, for all intents and purposes, dead to them.
When the silencer is family, that wound cuts deep. So, how should you meet and overcome this challenge?
In any relationship, it's vital that both parties extend each other grace. Having that sort of empathy based in humility (because you're not perfect!!) can go a long way towards maintaining an open and healthy relationship.
You teach others how you want to be treated. If you revert to being a doormat, you'll be treated as one.
Standing up for yourself may be hard, may cause some anger and hurt feelings, but in the long run is one of the best things you can do for yourself and for them.