DEALING WITH UNGRATEFUL PEOPLE
It seems, more and more, that ungratefulness is becoming a virtue in today’s society. More and more ungrateful people are expecting everything and, in return, give little or nothing. It’s really a sad commentary on society, and the pervasiveness of ungratefulness is seen in the fact that we celebrate random acts of kindness instead of that being, well, normal behavior.
We all know ungrateful people. They could be our family, our spouses, our kids, our coworkers, our friends… there is no exclusive demographic or relationship status when it comes to ungrateful people.
So, if you’re one of those rockstars who has to deal with ungrateful people here’s three simple ways to relieve your anxiety and stress over dealing with ungrateful people.
1. RELEASE YOUR EXPECTATIONS
Perhaps the biggest stressor in dealing with ungrateful people is that we don’t get the gratitude or thankfulness we believe we deserve. Well, that’s going to be the way it is. Ungrateful people take things you do, and you, for granted. They assume that you’ll continue to give them whatever they want because they deserve it simply for being in your life. When we don’t get the thanks we deserve, we can become resentful…and that’s not good for anyone.
2. QUIT HONORING THEIR REQUESTS
This is the tough one, especially when the ungrateful person is someone close to you. It’s human nature…well, for some…to want to extend a helping hand to those close to you when you ask. You may think you’re helping them, yet what you’re teaching them is dependency.
Now, I’m not saying cut them off completely. What I am saying is that ungrateful people can learn more, and in turn, grow more if they do ordinary tasks for themselves. This is particularly good for kids…they learn to be more self-sufficient and better prepared for life as an adult if they learn to do simple things on their own.
One of the simplest ways I learned how to turn down requests for my time and attention I learned from my friend and fellow speaker Pamela Jett. When someone who often takes advantage of your willingness to help out comes up and asks you for yet another favor, you can turn down their request by saying:
“I’d love to help you with that, however I (insert your priority here).”
It’s saying no without being rude.
3. SET FIRM BOUNDARIES
This one’s for you, rockstars. Set firm boundaries for yourself as to what you will and won’t do for those ungrateful people in your life. Without firm boundaries, they will suck all the energy out of you, monopolize your time, and keep your life off-balance. You deserve better than that.
Employing these three simple tools can begin to free you from the ungrateful people in your life. Soon you’ll be happier, you’ll have more time to do what you want, and you’ll begin to be surrounded by people who appreciate who you are and what you do.
How do you deal with ungrateful people? Let me know in the comments!